The McDonald-Trent State of the Almost Union

I’m genuinely touched when people ask us how we are, and mean it. So often it’s a greeting we say in passing, with no intention of really wanting to know that someone is stressed, feels ill, and so on. We respond with a quick, “Fine, thanks!” and then move on. Maybe we don’t have time to get into all the details of everything that’s going on. For whatever our reasons, we say, “Fine.” I’m pretty sure when our spouses died, Mason and I both told everyone we were OK and left it at that. 

We have been inundated with questions about Mason’s homecoming, and our plans (mostly because my Facebook posts are vague and assume the reader doesn’t care what’s going on). My Facebook is mostly reserved for ridiculous things we find in stores, and insulting things my daughter says. I have a twitter account but I might have used it once to send a picture of a squirrel in a kilt.

I am going to take the opportunity now, while I wait on a pizza, to try to update everyone on what’s been going on. Real quick apology to the followers that have read exactly one blog and don’t even know my name is Beth. Thank you for following me! You are about to learn more about me then you wanted to. 

Mason came home from Afghanistan at the end of March, he swears it was the beginning of April, it might have been. I’m just thrilled he didn’t die. I remembered to shave my legs, and was able to donate all of that hair to locks of love. 

Mason hit the ground running. He got home with orders to move to North Carolina to be with me. That’s not really what the order says, I think It says he has to keep flying for the Army or something, but it’s so much more romantic to say it’s to be with me.

We have kids. One each, Mason’s son, Eli, is 19, and my daughter, Gwen, is 10. They get along 99.9% of the time. We have NO idea how this happened. In addition to that fun fact, they LIKE doing things with us. I don’t know if they haven’t spent enough time online, or watching Nick Jr. to know they aren’t supposed to even like us let alone want to go along with my harebrained schemes to go bowling on a Friday night because there is NOTHING to do here but get drunk and vandalize things (at my age, I’m not even talking about the kids!)

The house is nearly sold. VERY NEARLY. We have the best realtor ever in KS, thanks to the most effective best friend ever that just gets things done (Katie, you know who you are). (PS No offense to the best realtor ever in NC.)

We’ve been rolling along with packing, inspections, pretending to be a normal family, Easter, I don’t know, other mundane shit, and some other really exciting crap like finishing a semester of college for Eli, homeschooling Gwen, finishing my college semester, and we decided to try a month long tanning spree (dumbest move ever for two pale scots), packed up the house, and actually did some work that we get paid for, got some doctors appointments in, had to fight tooth and nail to get a hotel reservation for the in between time of moving out and moving to NC (we were one reservation away from either homelessness for three weeks or losing friends kind enough to offer a home), bought a GMC we could all fit in (because we are all Amazonian tall), managed to get blacklisted from every Chevy dealer from here to Topeka ((not a lie), and I’m sure we did other things but I can’t remember it all because it’s been so much, wash rinse repeat with Vodka (for me not the kids, that’s not “responsible parenting”). All of that happened in less than four weeks. 

We remembered to turn off the utilities, stop the mail, blablabla. Each time Mason called a service provider, they asked if anyone was remaining in the home. By the fifth call I wanted to start telling people, “Yes, we decided to leave the kids behind but they aren’t prepared to pay for the internet. That won’t be an issue will it?”

We started packing the trailer of things we will take with us to drive half way across the country, and got a call from the best realtor ever. The worst home assessor ever decided to assess the home, and sit on her good ASSessment for over two weeks, leaving us with a laundry list of things to accomplish in 32 hours before we leave for the Bahamas on a Disney vacation we planned in 1984 because it took us that long to pay for it. 

Enter stage left all of the best friends in the universe to help us, a contractor that magically appeared to help get it all done (admittedly after I may have called him several times, and he only showed up because I scared him). Regardless, it all looks like it should get done by the closing date. 

So how are we? We are stressed. We are a little harebrained, possibly over caffeinated, the kids forgot deodorant 2 days in a row, I lost mine entirely, BUT we are hopeful, still making our bad jokes, and ready to be heading out for some pina coladas! 

Thank you to everyone that has helped us! Thank you to everyone who has asked after us. We are doing well because we have so much love and support still and we are grateful every day for it!

By this time tomorrow we will be in Florida (without deodorant). 

*I didn’t proof read this post because I don’t have time. Please assume I’m more intelligent than my typos.


2 thoughts on “The McDonald-Trent State of the Almost Union

  1. heather

    Somewhere in the back of my head I can hear the song, ‘Schools out for summer!’ You and Mason throwing crap in the air and running to the cars and peeling out, with your middle fingers held high. LOL! Not to the new said friends just the whole ‘We out!’ …Enjoy your drinks and fun times guys you both deserve it !


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